There were strange noises coming from Buck House last night, with some sources claiming that the centuries old tradition of chastity, sorry, that should read the chastity belt, is to be reinstated among the aristocracy.
With shocked faces all around the breakfast table this morning, the people of Britain will be wondering if this really is the time to be announcing such an austere measure, but the powers that be are determined to learn lessons from past mistakes. They want to send a clear message to the public that romance can only go so far in an institution as complex as the royal family.
At the time of the last big wedding back in '81, the country was riding a veritable tsunami of self importance and puffed up rhetoric, and the early opinions on the purity of Charles' marriage to Diana turned out to be rather wide of the mark. In the end, the wave broke on the shores of our cherished, er, 'constitution', and we we're all lucky that the country managed to avoid a total 'meltdown'.
Then came Sarah and Andrew: a poor man's Charles and Di but still nothing to be sniffed at when a little bit of Royal worshiping was called for, as it was at that time. It turned out that, with Sarah's chastity literally having been written all over her face by God, the 'highse of Windsaar' took its eye off the ball a bit, and the final tragedy of England's Rose unfolded on that harrowing night in Paris.
So, it seems that romance is dead, and the burden of duty must weigh heavily around the vadge of her madge to be, Kate Middleton. So, in the future, if you ever hear strange noises seeping from the palace, at least you'll know that its William's willy, and not anyone else's ,that's responsible for all the commotion.
Chastity belt
没有评论:
发表评论